My favourite 4 words

My favourite words to post ever - The container finally arrived!

:-) I was just reading another ex-pat bloggers page and she spoke about - you know you are an ex-pat when.... and one of the things was blogging about your container arrival.

I suppose it is a difficult concept to understand if you have never experienced the trials of trying to make do with less than 23kg's (cause the suitcase weight also has to be included) worth of stuff for an extended (way beyond expectations as is often the case) period of time. Like the dilemma of deciding whether to buy the extortionately priced swimming goggles for the kid whose doing once-a-week lessons as an after school activity when you know (and now kick yourself for having done so) that there are at least 50 4 pairs packed in one of the boxes sitting happily in the 'blessed' (my parents read this ... some language has been substituted) container which was meant to arrive before we did and thereby eliminating the need for me to make this decision in the first place. 

It may seem a small decision and possibly you would have done it in a split second but when one actually starts to think about all the decisions we (my long-suffering hubby and I) have had to make in the space of the last 6 months, one might feel more inclined to add more value to the pressure and stress that teeny tiny decision put me under. 

I'm not sure how pertinent it is to say that these decisions were the outcome of our ex-pat life choices or whether we just happen to be at that stage of our mature lives and a mass of decision-making comes with the territory but what I do know is that I have never had to make so many important (okay maybe not all of them life-changing important but important none the less) in all my life. To say my 'brain is fried' is an understatement.

One of our important decisions in the last month or so has been to decide whether to rent out or property in the UK or not. Such a difficult choice really as we have come to call England our home and our children have grown-up there and we have lifelong friendships nurtured there - do we want to tie up that loose tie, really truly... well anyway to cut a long story short we decided to go for it and I flew up to get everything properly packed up until we can find something else. 

It was eerie walking into the house and knowing that the next time I see it it'll not be ours ... well you know what I mean. It was a hard physical and emotional 2 weeks for me packing everything up and decided what should really be thrown out now, what we should send to our new 'forever' home (this was the most difficult of all as I wanted to send all of it) and what should stay and be used to make our new UK home home eventually. The plus was I got to spend really good quality time with friends and family as I was by myself and could set my own schedule. 

My trip did clarify one of our other important decisions as to where next to buy in that I was made even more aware of what a strong connection we have with Billingshurst and surrounds now that it would just feel weird not to be going there on our return visits. In the final days of my time there I found the perfect bolt hole (being in the right place at the right time essentially) and all things going smoothly we should own it by Christmas.

I joked with a friend as I was leaving that on my immigration forms from now on I am going to put in the space that previously I have written things like mom (they questioned me regards this reply once ?), mother, home executive and even once boldly put silversmith the following occupation: Intercontinental Removals & Packing Expert with Strong Professional Skills in Emotional Well-Being & Making New Friends & Keeping Old Ones (I added the last bit just now - i'm sure Clare will approve). What a business card hey?! But in the last few days you won't believe how I wish someone would take that job description seriously and pay me some attention when I voice my opinion. My husband joked in a follow-up voicemail to the one where he 'calmly' told me what a 'fool' I was for not carrying the car papers at all times in the car, that he should never have doubted me as I am always right .... he jokes .. I'm serious - if the stats on my being right even after being doubted were compared to the stats on when I was proven wrong or incorrect I'd be a sure bet as the ideal candidate for the job, or a no-risk business plan. 

I am still newbie ex-pat wife by all accounts but thanks to the excellent training of Sundae I have an extremely good and deeper understanding of being a 'trailing spouse'. Her course encourages 'trailing spouses' to make changes and focus on becoming a 'Trailblazing spouse' instead. (every global company hiring ex-pats should offer her course to new spouses, it should be compulsory and will make there lives so much easier)

My biggest question is why do companies (spouses with the jobs) place no worth on our skills (that is those amazing Intercontinental Removals & Packing Experts with Strong Professional Skills in Emotional Well-Being & Making New Friends & Keeping Old Ones).

Can you tell i'm a little introspective today? For the millionth time I am being told that 'the company' says you can't have this and unfortunately this week they've said there is no budget for my little shed which I would use to help myself to a little self-worth and produce pretty things for people who like my jewellery and keep myself busy and thus happy and thus my family happy and thus my husband happy and thus them happy - no?

Anyway I digress - The container arrived!!!

Chocolate Spread Sandwiches & Youtube

My 8-year olds latest request is to go and live with Nana for at least a year. What brought this on you might ask? Well I was threatening him with his life if he didn't eat the vegetables on his plate one evening when it all came out that Nana's house was way better and it would be so EPIC if he could stay there for at least a year because then he would be able to only eat chocolate spread sandwiches while watching Youtube… oooooh really I say, which is when big sister quickly tries to save the day by saying no mom he ate chocolate spread sandwiches and cucumber and carrots for supper! oh well then that's ok then says I. 

Naaannnnaaaaa! That's the last time she gets them for 3 weeks ;-) Only kidding Mom. What a godsend it was that they were able to stay with my mom this past holiday. 

We came down from the UK en-route to Zambia via SA. We spent a week with Clayton and the in-laws in the Kruger (surprise, surprise) and had an absolutely fantastic time and then made our way down to spend a few days with my mom, my sister and my gran at a lovely ladies beach house near Port Alfred in the Eastern Cape. Bearing in mind it was the middle of winter in SA, we had a fabulous time just spending time with each other and having lazy days. My gran has been very poorly over the last few months and we were so grateful to be able to spend the quality time with her. It was really important for me that my children have the opportunity to get to know her better as they were all quite small the last time we saw her. My favourite bits were her teaching them to play Checkers, building bloody difficult puzzles together and choosing the worst possible day to try dune surfing and body boarding!

Then the kids stayed with Nana and I headed back up to do some supervision of the renovation of our house in Pretoria. I really enjoyed it actually and think I did a reasonable job. The house's maintenance had been much neglected over the years and spare funds had prevented us from updating it but after much saving, a lot of discussions and a well connected bros-in-law we managed to make some valuable changes. 

In between all that though the kids came back and we spent a good 2 weeks with Granny & Grandpa. Jenna was by far the most excited by this part as it meant she got to spend more time with their cousins - Anika and Luke and as an extra bonus Anika's christening was while we were there and they got to see their Richard's Bay cousins too. 

Precious moments. 

We also spent time revisiting old haunts and discovering a few new ones. Gold Reef City was definitely a highlight (thanks cousin Andre). I'm not sure who had more fun - the kids or Granny….

Needless to say though that Owen's not getting his wish this year but maybe Nana can twist my arm and he'll have a few chocolate spread sandwiches more than normal when she comes to visit at Christmas time. 

Journey down south

Oh my goodness - did you just see that whirlwind that went through here???? Yup that was us the Reeves family trying to do it all again! What a few months it has been.. 

I'll start at the end shall I and try and work my way back as I have so much to fill you all in on. 

As I eluded to in my previous post - we're now nicely settled in our new home in Solwezi, Zambia. 

We are lucky enough and truly blessed to live on a golf estate just outside of the town and within 10 minutes from the mine for Clayton. The house itself is positively palatial in it's modernness compared to our Ouaga home. We're in a newly built section at the bottom of the golf course and our veranda and back garden overlook the 8th hole and 9th tee. What's even nicer is that the estate is stocked with wildlife who happily come and feast on the lovely green grass of the fairways and greens. We've seen Zebra, Sable Antelope, Impala, Puku Antelope, Lechwe Antelope, Oribi Antelope, many Yellow-Billed Kites and an unknown Frog.

#Estateliving so far is the bees knees. The kids have discovered their independence and certainly trying their best to encourage my feelings of redundancy :-) The boys are completely immersed in their new found love for fishing and it helps that there are at least 3 fully stocked dams within walking distance with fish it seems that are suckers for punishment! They operate a 'catch and release' scheme here but as Owen says - you only have to count to 5 and you have another fish on your hook mom! Maybe this kind of 'speed' fishing will entice their dad to try his hand at it too. Besides the fishing all three kids have made some lovely friends and spend their afternoons going for house to house in little people gangs. 

Robert, for now and Owen's school is on the estate - not quite walking distance although it can be done in a hurry if necessary, and the boys are loving it. They both have lovely teachers and the their classrooms are fab. It's a small school but their classes are slightly bigger than what the boys had at ISO. 

Jenna's school is a bus ride away and is in the most beautiful setting ever adjoining the mine's game reserve. It's a long day for her though as they set off here at 6.30am and only come back around 5pm. They have lessons until 1.20pm then a break for lunch and then compulsory after school activities until 4.15pm. Jen is doing hockey, netball and history club. Even so she is also loving it and so enjoying getting back into her sports.

Life hasn't been all roses though and we've had some teething issues. Our container has been ridiculously delayed and shows no sign of turning up soon. Getting our pets (Russell the dog and Morris the cat) here has turned into a nightmare and is only just this weekend (fingers and toes crossed) being sorted out as Clayton has travelled up to Ouaga to fetch them and is making his way back today. And then a few minor things like getting a car here is not as easy as it sounds and so on and so on. 

We're tying up all the bits and pieces now though and once december arrives we're looking forward to just kicking back and enjoying our time together as a family after so many years of going and froing! 

Oh and did I mention - the washing gets done by someone else :-)

Quick Catch Up

I'm ashamed at how unseriously I have taken this blogging thingy. I haven't told you all about our fabulous trip to the paradise of Zanzibar, I haven't even given you a mention of my hush hush surprise trip to the UK followed by an absolutely awesome week with my Sista in Hiroshima and then of course (although most of you know thanks to the joy of Facebook and the proverbial grapevine) that we are in fact upsticksing and moving to Zambia this summer (winter for all ya southerners).

Ok virtual handslap done….

Zanzibar was amazing. I have never seen such white white beaches and such blue blue sea. It was just the holiday we all needed with much lazing, swimming, snorkelling, sight-seeing and reading. Zanzibar was also the most fantastic contrast to the dry, dusty, desolate looking Ouagadougou and so it took ages to complete the 're-entry phase' as it's referred to in the ex-pat world. 

We spent 2 weeks in Zanzibar with my mom, my sista and my in-laws. In fact although it feels like we didn't do anything we accomplished a fair amount in that time. My mom and the kids swam with regte egte sea turtles while Clayton and I captured the moments in between giggles …. Robert proclaimed the water too cold - no, I'm not scared he said it's just cold! Jenna jumped in feet first and we had to drag her out she loved it so much. Mom and Owen did it hand in hand. We hired a car for a few days and travelled from the North to the South of the Island - we did a very informative but hysterically funny spice tour and I personally will never use nutmeg the same way again, we saw the Zanzibar Red Colobus monkeys only found there up close and personally, we trailed through the Mangroves and all the while took in the most amazing scenes of village life, gorgeous green farming, palm trees and ocean views. There was hours of snorkelling and pouring over lists to confirm sightings, much beach walking and secret eateries discovered. But my most favourite bit was getting to spend time together as a family playing board games, sharing meals and being lazy in our spaces. 

to be continued...

Ouaga Week 11!!!!

Oh my goodness – it’s been weeks since I last wrote – you must all be getting withdrawal symptoms already!

Life here in Ouaga has moved along with a speed. The kids have completed their first quarter at school and we have passed the halfway mark between arriving and holidaying – we’re almost 3 paydays in now ;-)

The biggest event I have to share is the arrival of our container about 10 days ago. What an occasion. There were approx. 10 people helping the poor driver reverse the truck into our drive but many hands made light work and after it taking us a whole day to pack the container it took us less than a half hour to clear it. Fantastically we have a huge enclosed veranda so we could consolidate and add some order to the proceedings and it meant the house stayed fairly neat. Unpacking provided great excitement for not just us but the many curious visitors we had over the next few days. The children’s water guns provided much entertainment once they’d been rinsed and left out to air, (our only real casualty of container delays was the lunchbox ‘someone’ had accidentally packed into the toy box … luckily it was only the outside toys and it’s a lovely big plastic crate that was washed easily (and I didn’t have to clean it!)) our DVD collection was raided and already books have been borrowed.

Unfortunately Clayton left about an hour after the container arrived for a scheduled trip to Conakry, Guinea so we were restricted somewhat not in our unpacking but in our decision-making. Anyhow we did brilliantly and had almost everything unpacked and ‘sorted’ within 2 or so days. Thank goodness we did though as the next week was manic.

Clayton came back from Guinea feeling really tired and run-down and spent the Sunday night forcing me off the bed as he was so hot to the touch. It turned out on Monday by positive show of two little blue lines (very reminiscent of 3 other tests we’ve done) that he had malaria. The diagnosis and treatment here is top rate so as long as you start the medication as quickly as you can the disease is not life threatening. People here seem a bit blasé in some ways as the more we discuss it now the more we discover how some people have had malaria over 26 times and class it as really bad flu!

Clayton however having experienced it for the first time was definitely not in agreement and spent a horrible 3 days going through each and every stage (cold, hot, sweats) very thoroughly. By the 4^th day he had rallied to the couch and managed an hour or two in office. By Sunday (yesterday) the 7^th day he was still conveniently recovering when he had to take a break from his list of jobs which had been on hold since the now infamous container had arrived. For ease of mind though he is feeling much better this morning and is off to the mine for a week of head office visits and technical reviews.

As I mentioned before the kids have completed their first quarter at school and today is the first day of a week’s break. We haven’t much planned as dad’s away but Jenna and Robert are attending a ‘stage’ (french for a kind of internship) at their horse riding school for 3 mornings starting tomorrow. It should be fun and they are really looking forward to it as it involves not only some riding but also instructions on how to saddle the horses, brush them and generally care for them. Rumor has it there might even be some acrobatic training!

Owen and I are planning a few chill out in the pool activities and have volunteered our services for a morning or two at the school library. They are having a big 2^nd hand book sale and need barcodes removed from all the sale books… I figure that’d be right up Owens street.

We really have all been made to feel so much part of the community here. Friendships here are fast and furious and bonds seem to be formed so quickly. Someone mentioned that subconsciously or possibly knowingly we all realize that we are here for finite amount of time and there is no time to pussyfoot and for want of a better word woo each other, we have to get in there, get involved and become friends or get left behind J Robert has embraced this way of life completely and now has a twin. Their teacher finds them so alike and always together that he has taken to calling them both WillBert (William & Robert). He is also doing so well at school and besides the usual ‘talks a bit too much’ has had a very impressive progress report so far.

Owen has a new bestie called Connor who is the son of a teacher couple at the school and is a delightful fella who says dude a lot! They’ve taken to organizing their own playdates and since I am often not at pick-up its not unusual for an extra person to be dropped off at our house after-school.

Jenna has taken us all by surprise and although hasn’t firmed up any mega friendships is friends with everyone from the littlies to the higher graders. She has been doing absolutely brilliantly in her school work to and according to her progress reports is set to bring home A’s and B’s this term! (for those in the know, you’ll know this a huge achievement and just cements that we are making the right decisions with regards her education) I was reduced to tears though last week when a teacher came up to me to tell me how amazing Jenna is at the local orphanage she visits every week. He shared some lovely stories and made me such a proud mom. She is often the only student who goes to the orphanage – it’s an elective after-school activity. She has such a big heart and can be such a caring child …. It helps when people share these things with you as a parent because you can hold onto those images for dear life when she has her very regular ‘teenage’ moments and her life is spared!

I am enjoying the sunshine here and the lifestyle and the house-help has given me the time to get involved with a whole host of activities. As I’ve mentioned I’m part of the PTA here and we are in the process of organizing the biggest event of the school year here – Holiday Fair. It’s an event that hosts over 90 vendors and has more than 2000 visitors from throughout Ouaga walk through the gates. There’s also a host of other activities happening like – a Christmas concert, Santa’s visit and games galore so much much organizing. One of things I’m helping with is finding sponsors – the response is amazing (apparently it’s the same every year) and it looks like the main prize in the Raffle will be a flight from Turkish Airlines to anywhere for one person! 

One of the other reasons last week was so manic was because I also did a few hours of substitute teaching for one of Jenna’s classes. I so enjoyed it and am hoping to get involved with some special needs teaching on a more regular (once a week) basis.

I’ve also been invited to help out on the OEA (Ouagadougou Ex-pats Association) committee. It was started a few years ago by some real go-getters who unfortunately left last year and so things have kind of fizzled out and the two ladies left holding the baby (one literally J) just haven’t got the time on their own. We’re starting with a kick-off drinks get together in Nov that already has a sponsor!

On top of that I’m desperately trying to get back into my workshop (which isn’t nearly big enough already!) to create some pretty things. I’ve managed some new curtains for Owen’s room but Christmas is fast approaching and my usual idea of doing everything handmade is once again being pushed to the limit. Why do we always leave things to the last minute? I think people in general work better under pressure perhaps and although we complain about the stress we’re actually thriving on it.

My plan mostly while here is to keep myself as busy as possible. I fill my mornings and the kids and I have afternoons together and then if Clayton is around (L) evenings are his. It is so easy to withdraw and cocoon oneself and it’s a constant battle for me to keep on top of the melancholy that sets in when I think about my friends and family both in SA and the UK. I’m really finding the loss of independence in terms of not having my own car difficult and although I have access to shared drivers our schedules are not always mutually agreeable.  

However the absolutely breath-giving emails that you all take the time to send me are so appreciated and I sincerely apologise if I take too long to reply. Please know that you are always all in our thoughts and we miss you all terribly.

Ok enough soppy stuff. It’s just 7 weeks until we visit the UK (so looking forward to some nice crisp winter air) and then only 11 or so days and we’ll be sunning ourselves on a tropical beach – hope Father Christmas can find us.

As soon as I figure out how to transfer the photos from my new Samsung phone (any techies among you have some advice for me?) I’ll send out another picture newsletter. We have seen some amazing things in town and on the roads already and we’ve even had the camel man come to our door (ok garden gate but still) to take the kids for a ride. He’s so completely traditionally looking in his turban and many layers of cotton gowns but I had to laugh at the very modern laptop bag attached to the saddle of the camel! He must get amazing signal on top of that hump J

6 weeks in Ouaga

So we are 6 weeks in! 
I can't quite believe how the time has flown. We have settled in quite well - I think anyway. 

The kids received their mid-term (mid-term already, didn't they just start term?!) and I'm not sure whether the teachers are just trying to ease us in but all the kids received glowing remarks :-) The boys received no marks but got fantastic comments from their homeroom teachers. When we originally registered at the school we made an important decision in consultation with Jen to let her redo her first year of high-school (for a list of reasons really) but unfortunately the school bumped her up a year by mistake. We decided to ride it out and see how she did but it became clear a couple of weeks in that we needed to make some changes. Everything pointed to moving her down as originally decided and so thats what we did. .. anyhow that was a long way of telling you that her report was a bit more complicated and in the end her progress report was for the work she did in Gr7 even though she is know in Gr6. The most exciting bit of that long story is that our daughter got A's and B's!! Silly child - she has no self-confidence in her own intelligence!And thus what we are now focused on. Homework is a nightmare but she is slowing but surely getting her shit act together.

Clays last week or so have been a bit bleh - he has been hectically busy at work and had to do a quick trip up to the mine all while nursing some kind or viral parasite tummy thing. He's feeling much better now and so am I as his trip to *inthethroesofelectioralunrest* Guinea has been postponed again. 

Intro

Is it bad that my 4 year-old can recognise the name Simon Cowell of X-Factor fame? And that my 7 year-old realise's that it's not all about the talent but about whether they can mould them or not?

So I'm starting this blog/vent as an outlet for all things kids, life, and all things domestic! Or not as it turns out. I'm not the domestic goddess I thought I was without my South African domestic. My washing pile grows exponentially and the ironing one is never ever done, how? My husband, the-logical-thinking-engineer's reasoning is that we must have too many clothes. Well since I get most of them through my favourite 'freecycle' site or as hand-me-downs from friends, it doesn't come out of the family wallet so surely it's not a bad thing?